Light Bulb Jokes

What does it take to replace a fused light bulb?

PAP:

Engage foreign talents to check out the best method to replace the bulb. They will be paid according to what other experts are being paid. For manpower, foreign workers would be employed to cut down the operating cost.

To make it cost-effective, people using the bulb would pay a fee. The fee calculation is intrinsically very complexed. If you use it for a long period of time without turning it off, you pay more. But if you periodically switch on and off, you have rebates for using it but everytime you switch on, you pay an additional fee.

In the end, there is surplus and it's redistributed back to those who use the bulb.

WP:

Insist on using local talents to do the job. Their remunerations are benchmarked upon the multiplication of a factor by the lowest paid worker. The workers contracted are all locals.

To make it affordable for workers, there will be minimum fees imposed. Unions will be consulted if operating costs rise and if workers strike, then lights would not be turned on and cost is saved in the end.

SDA:

Who does the job doesn't really matter BUT it all depends on budget. With such a tight budget, it's hard to accomplish things. Representative will express anger on the tight budget allocation.

In the end, the bulb is still left unfixed. However, the supporters still rally with pride because they know they are unfairly treated.

Reform Party:

Newly established, this does not mean they lack the experience given the veteran level of the leader. The bulbs will not be replaced because the whole system is faulty!

The entire building will be demolished and rebuilt from scratch. That is how a bulb should be fixed.

SDP:

Gather a group of supporters and get them to wear Tak Boleh Tahan Shirts to protest against the spoilt bulb. At the same time, books, apparels, accessories will be retailed to gather enough money to sustain the group and if there are excess, then fix the bulb.

When enough money is gathered, fixing the bulb will be via Democratic means. That is, everyone gets to vote on the bulb wattage, the company to engage, the time for them to fix, and the list goes on. During the voting period, all are welcome to express their concern and anger since they have freedom of speech and the right to assemble.

When the votes support an unrealistic way to replace the bulb, the bulb will not be replaced! All the supporters will quietly sit down and perform a hunger strike (with glucose water sponsored). This is called "Civilised Naughtiness". The process will be recorded and downloadable via youtube so that no one misses out on the fun.